Duo's T.V. Adventures
by Gigasbolt
Summary: All of Duo's T.V. Adventures, in a neat little chapter set up.
1. Dexter And Duo's Dilemna

Well, this is a really freaked out idea I had.. I guess I was watching just wee bit too much Dexter's Laboratory. I was thinking of Gundam Wing, watching Dexter.. IT CAME TO ME, DON'T BLAME ME.. I just write what the mind comes up with. -------------------------------------------------------- 

Dexter and Duo's Dilemna 

By: Gigasbolt 

"What to do?" was heard coming from both hunched forms. Their clothes were charred black and their hair was pretty much burned. A blonde haired girl who didn't seem to have suffered much damage was running in the background. 

"I say we kill her." 

Flashback... 

"DEE DEE!! Get out of my laboratory!" Dexter was fed up with his sister always coming in here. He had an idea for a new robot and he was going to make sure that he completed it before Dee Dee came in again. 

"Deathscythe, I've got to find a new way to hide you." Duo stood in front of his Gundam. It was just too obvious in this suburban town he'd made his way to. Even on the outskirts, it would still be noticeable. 

"Huph.. Finally. I finished it." Dexter stood in front of a giant robot that looked much like himself.. Only a robot, of course. "The Dexodroid 7000. The perfect fighting machine." Suddenly, alarms began going off. On instinct, Dexter yelled "DEE DEE! GET OUT OF-" The Computer interrupted him, though. 

"Dexter, the alarms are coming because of the onset of strange new robots in your neighborhood." The Computer then proceeded to show images of Aries, Tauros, and Leo Mobile Suits running rampant over his school and buildings. 

"Dexodroid, activate." Dexter suddenly stood in his pilot outfit, you know the one, black on white with big red D on the front.. I digress. He leaped into the air, accessing the Dexodroid's pilot chamber and launched into the air. He landed on the battlefield. He pulled out a large.. and I mean 'LARGE' laser, and began firing on the Aries, knocking out quite a few. A Leo had just snuck up on him, when a large green scythe appeared, cutting the Leo down. "I don't know who you are, other robot. But thank you." 

"Don't mention it, whoever you are. It's my mission to take down these things." Duo replied to the unknown robot. He began wiping out Tauros and Leos alongside the Dexodroid and they eventually finished them all off. The Dexodroid beckoned to Deathscythe and Duo followed into Dexter's underground hangar. Duo was amazed as a young boy with orange hair was lowered to the ground. 

"Thank you for your help, whoever you are. Maybe you should have your hair looked at though, when was the last time you had a haircut?" Dexter offered his opinion on Duo's braid. 

"Hey, kid. I like my haircut. And besides, the name's Duo. What's yours?" 

"I am Dexter, boy genius. And I was piloting the new robot I built last night, the Dexodroid 7000. He was a complete success." Dexter reached over and gave his high-five machine a high five. Duo looked on, obviously showing his disdain for this kid's attitude. 

"Look, I'm glad for the help, Dexter, but maybe I could just leave my Gundam here for the night and.." Suddenly, a loud scream was heard. 

"HI DEXTER!! OOOOHH... WHAT'S THAT!!" Dee Dee came running in and began climbing all over Duo's Gundam. 

"Hey you! Get off there." Duo was a little worried, she was climbing into the cockpit.. 

"OOH.. WHAT'S THIS BUTTON DO?" Dee Dee pressed a large red button on the side of the pilot's chair. Unfortunately, this red button controlled the Self-Destruct on Duo's Gundam. The explosion leveled the Dexodroid 7000, not to mention the Deathscythe, Dexter's lab and house and pretty much everything within a 5 mile radius. 

"What to do?" was heard coming from both hunched forms. Their clothes were charred black and their hair was pretty much burned. A blonde haired girl who didn't seem to have suffered much damage was running in the background. 

"I say we kill her." 


	2. Duo And The Jawbreaker???

figured if MegaDeathscythe could work with Wufei, I'd stick to my strengths. And that's Duo. This story is in honor of MegaDeathscythe. -------------------------------------------------------- 

Duo and the Jawbreaker?? 

By: Gigasbolt 

"Well, at least that kid put Deathscythe back together." Duo was piloting the mighty Gundam towards another close neighborhood. He couldn't stand that little blond girl, and he told Dexter he was sorry he couldn't take care of her, but it would have been too much work. Besides, the God of Death doesn't really like a lot of work. He was piloting Deathscythe over a culdesac looking place, when he spotted some Mobile Suits coming this way on his radar. "Uh oh! Where do I go?" 

"Duh, this'll be so cool, Eddy. Double-D built a rocket and we're gonna launch it." Ed was running around like usual. 

"Ed, shut up. I know what Double-D built. Sheesh." Eddy was readying the booth they were gonna use to take up money. The kids were just coming towards him. Suddenly, a large shadow covered the culdesac. All the kids looked up and began checking out a giant robot. "Wow, Double-D.. You really outdid yourself." 

"That's not me, Eddy. I'm over here." Edd replied. He set the rocket down and looked up as well. 

"Oh, great! Deathscythe, I gotta take you down." Duo began landing the Deathscythe. As he did, he suddenly felt an explosion under his foot and checked his damage comp. "Oh no.. My right foot has been damaged.. How did Oz do that?" 

"Hey, you big robot person thingy.. You stepped on Double-D's rocket blaster. I'm gonna get you!" Ed flung himself at Deathscythe's foot, biting it. He then pulled back, not a chip on his teeth, I'll give him that, but also not a chip on Deathscythe. "Well, I tried Eddy." 

"HEY!! YOU'RE NOT MAKING ME MONEY! DO SOMETHING SO I CAN CHARGE THE SUCKERS!" Eddy yelled at Deathscythe. 

"Um.. Eddy, I don't think that's a very good idea." Edd looked up from cleaning the mess that Deathscythe had made from stepping on his rocket. "Messy messy messy." 

"Look at that, Plank. I knew that the robot's would come and save all the paint cans in the town.. Let's go." Johnny and Plank ran off to their paint can collection. Don't ask me, Plank's the brains of their outfit. 

"What a dork." Kevin turned to zoom off on his bike when Deathscythe turned around. 

"Dork? Nobody calls the God of Death's Gundam a dork!" Duo turned his scythe on, swinging it into Kevin's bike, destroying it and sending Kevin flying towards his house. 

"This is my kind of machine!!" Eddy cried, hugging the robot's heel. 

"This is just like that movie, 'Attack of the Giant Robots From Mars,' Eddy. The robot is here to save us from more evil robots from Jupiter." Ed was busy comparing real life to the movies again as Edd studied the structure of Deathscythe. 

"Ooo.. What an interesting metal alloy." Edd sketched Deathscythe, making sure to try the design later on in one of his own creations. 

"Oh great.. Oz is getting closer. Those 3 down there are the only kids left." Duo opened the pilot hatch and grabbed his cord handle. He swung off towards them and the ground. 

"Oh, Eddy. We have a visitor." Edd said, looking over at Eddy and pointing towards Duo. 

"Hey, do you pilot that thing?" Eddy asked. 

"Yeah, and listen, I need some help. Can you guys help me hide it. The foot's damaged and my mobility is down. I can't fight with it in that condition." Duo looked at them pleadingly. He had to save Deathscythe. 

"Well, let's get the laughs over with. Ed, do you have any ideas?" Eddy looked at Ed, who was playing with his foot. 

"Hmm.. Duh... Buttered Toast, Eddy." Ed said. A spark was heard in the background as Ed's brain overloaded and all reasoning and thinking skills were shut down. But then, what's the difference between that and when Ed's skills are on? 

"Well, that was a good try, Ed. Now, Double-D?" Eddy redirected his attention to Edd as Ed laughed incessantly in the background. He apparently thought Buttered Toast was extremely hilarious. 

"Well, it just so happens I had plans for a device large enough to do the job. Come with me, to the garage!" Edd, Eddy and Duo all headed for the garage. Unfortunately, they left Ed laughing over Buttered Toast. Ed's brain then picked this time to restart and his laughing stopped abruptly. He looked around. 

"Guys? Hey guys? OOOooo.." They'd left him alone with the big robot thingy. This was too good a chance. Ed climbed the legs up until he reached Duo's cord. He then grabbed it and proceeded to get into the pilot's chair. "This is just like 'Mutant Zord Pilots from Uranus,' It's so cool!" Ed reached for the control sticks and took off. "WHOA!!" He was out of control and having the time of his crazy, misbegotten, non-understood life. 

"Hey, what the!" Duo checked his watch and saw that Deathscythe had been activated. He stuck his head out the window and saw it fly crazily overhead. "WHO'S PILOTING IT!!" 

"Where's Ed?" Edd and Eddy said together. 

"BUTTERED TOAST!!" Ed screamed through Deathscythe's radio system. It blared out through it's speakers. It was so loud everyone on the block heard it. Including our quartet minus one. 

"ED!" Edd cried. 

"Ed, you maniac." Eddy just laughed. 

"I'LL KILL HIM IF HE DAMAGES DEATHSCYTHE!!!" Duo screamed. Eddy and Duo ran out to find Ed, while Edd worked on the... hiding apparatus. 

"Hey, what's that on radar.. IT'S A GUNDAM!! RUN!!!" All the Oz Mobile suits exclaimed. They turned to run while Ed finally landed Deathscythe. He pressed a button, which caused Deathscythe to pull out the scythe. 

"Duh.. Luke.. I am your brother.. HAUAHUHAHUHA!" Ed laughed. He loved that movie. He swung the scythe, cutting the Leo's in half. Then, the Aries came in, shooting like all get out. "BUTTERED TOAST!!" Ed cried his battle cry, reminscient of The Tick's 'SPOON' and launched his shield into the closest Aries. It drilled its way through and flew back around to Deathscythe's arm. "Whoa, cool.. Huh huh.." The Aries and Leos began to fall back, calling in the new Tauros suits for back up. Ed chose this time to maeke an escape. He zoomed back towards the garage, just as Eddy and Duo caught up to him. 

"Oh shoot! C'mon." Eddy shouted as they turned and ran back to the garage, where Ed had landed. After about another 20 minutes, they finally got back, but Deathscythe was gone. 

"What'd you do now?" Duo asked. He was getting sick of running into all these weird people. He just wanted to go home.. 

"The 'Jawbreaker' is complete, Eddy." Edd pulled a curtain down and revealed a massive jawbreaker. 

"JAWBREAKER!" Ed was tied down, but still ran for the Jawbreaker. 

"What's in it? It's huge!" Eddy looked at the thing, his mouth watering. "More importantly, what flavor is it?" 

"Metal Eddy. Inside that fake jawbreaker exterior is our friend's Gundam." Edd explained. Suddenly, the Tauros suits landed. 

"There were reports of a Gundam sighted here. Do you kids know anything about it?" The Tauros pilot asked. 

"No." Duo said, acting non-chalant, but hoping this would work. 

"No, but I'll let you know if I see one." Eddy said. "For a price.." He added. 

"No, of course not, sir. We would never withold information from the military." Edd, of course. 

"Drink Mister?" Ed. Before they could shut him up, he continued. "I'm the Sales-Ed. Huh huh.." 

"That laugh.. and what's that giant thing behind you?" 

"Oh, that's just a jawbreaker." 

"It's too big, no one could eat that... Destroy it!" The Tauros lined up there cannons. 

"JAWBREAKER!!" Ed screamed, breaking free from his bonds. He grabbed the jawbreaker, amazingly drawing the entire thing into his mouth. He looked hilarious, what with a Gundam sized jawbreaker in his mouth. The Tauros suits laughed and moved on. 

"Ed, that was brilliant. Now please, spit our friend's Gundam out before he has a hernia." Edd pleaded. Duo was behind him, giant veins popping out of his forehead. 

"GET.. DEATHSCYTHE.. OUT.. OF YOUR MOUTH!" Duo screamed. He rushed Ed, tackling him. This caused Deathscythe to be spit out and hit the floor, cracking the jawbreaker open and leaving Deathscythe exposed. Duo leaped in, even though it was a bit slimy and took off. He'd rather face the Tauros suits than those guys. He sliced through all of the Tauros suits there with the scythe and thundered off into the distance. 

"Duh, Good-bye friend." Ed cried, waving until Deathscythe disappeared. 

"Ed, shut up!" 


	3. Duo In T.V. Land

Duo In TV Limbo.  
  
Written By: Gigasbolt  
---------------------------------  
  
"Well gee, what's gonna happen to me now. First I meet up with this little red-haired kid with a weird accent and his sister blows up Deathscythe. Then, I meet these 3 guys all with the same name.. WHAT NEXT!!" Duo was busily ranting to no one in particular while he washed Deathscythe. He still couldn't banish the thought of Ed putting Deathscythe into his mouth. He shuddered and scrubbed harder. He was putting the cloth back into the bucket when it disappeared. Followed by the cloth. Then, everything except Duo and Deathscythe were gone. "WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING HERE?????!!!!!"   
  
*Click*  
  
An alley appears around Duo and Deathscythe. Duo looks around and notices some kind of can sitting up on a garbage can at the end of the alley. "Huh?"  
  
"All right... SURGE!!!" A dis-embodied voice screams. Suddenly, a giant crowd of kids come running down the alley straight towards the can. And, unfortunately, Duo. He opens his mouth to scream as the crowd gets closer to running him open.  
  
*Click*  
  
"AAh.... What??" The scream trails off as Duo looks around again. He was in some strange kind of bedroom. There was a large circular bed with a bedsheet that looked like an English Flag. He hears a door open in the background and whips around.  
  
"Do I make you horny, baby?" Austin Powers says.   
  
"AAAAAAHH!!" Duo screamed as the shirtless, hairy secret agent closed in on himself and Deathscythe.  
  
*Click*  
  
"Whu..." Duo was actually getting used to the strange jumping around he was doing. He was standing in the background, watching some guys in monkey suits running around Paris. He walked up behind them, noticing that they were absorbed in some kind of TV Show. It was a monkey doing.... Well, you know. Music began to play. That familiar beat.. it could only be.   
  
"You and me baby ain't nothing but mammals, so let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel."  
  
"Do it again now."  
  
"You and me baby ain't nothing but mammals, so let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel."  
  
"What the heck kind of song is this??" Duo looked on as the Monkey Suited guys ran around, capturing people.   
  
"Get Horn-ay!!"  
  
"Oooo... Kay..." Duo was totally not amused by this. He didn't understand, he would have normally thought this was funny, maybe it was because he was still a bit queasy from seeing Austin Powers shirtless. But, whatever the case, he wasn't having fun. Especially when the lead Monkey-boy discovered Deathscythe. He dragged it over and shoved a midget out of the way, putting Deathsycthe into the front of some kind of pyramid. He hopped in and began to make Deathscythe.... DANCE!!! "NOOOO!!" Deathscythe was being forced to put his hands together, going back and forth. Then, waving his arm over his... Armored Area.. This was unacceptable! Duo ran towards his Gundam, screaming un-mentionable obscenities at the Monkey-boy. He clung to his Gundam's legs, climbing up them and eventually rousting the Monkey-boy from his seat. He was about to take off when..  
  
*Click*  
  
"And now, for all you health watchers out there, we've got a special treat. Today's infomercial stars none other than... George Foreman." The host clicked his mike off and stepped off-stage.  
  
"Hey everybody, I've got another hard hitting grill for ya... What the HELL is that??" George screamed, Deathscythe appearing in the background.   
  
"Yuck.. Health Food." Duo piloted Deathscythe towards the aforementioned Foreman Grill and slashed it through.  
"That's one small slash for me, one giant slash for all Junk-food junkies!"  
  
*Click*  
  
"When will the insanity end.." Duo cried, as he fell through what seemed to be a never-ending black hole. He suddenly landed in some strange place he'd never seen before. Deathscythe, his one true love was gone.. possibly forever, Duo didn't know. And know he was in the middle of a large field wearing a.. BUNNY SUIT??!! This was just too much. Suddenly, a fox leaped into the air, running straight towards Duo.  
  
"Run, Thumper." A deer cried, running off into the woods.  
  
"Oh dear God in heaven, not BAMBI!!"  
  
*Click*  
  
"I'm sorry, I've tormented you enough.." A loud, booming voice cried. Duo was back where he started, the same cartoony looking place from the beginning of this crazy mis-begotten adventure.  
  
"Who are you?" Duo asked, looking around.   
  
"I am... Well, I can't tell you who I am."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Because, I'm returning Deathscythe to you, and I don't wanna be on your hit list." Deathscythe reappeared and Duo hugged it's leg. "I'm so glad you're back. I was so worried."  
  
*Click*  
  
The screen begins to fade out on that happy scene, leaving one satisfied TV viewer, Gigasbolt, and one happy viewee, Duo. Just another Day In TV Land...  
  
The End. 


End file.
